#1 Mistake Guys Make

I was 18 when I met Danielle. We worked in a bar together. She was a server. I was a bartender.

With her I made the biggest mistake possible with women…

We flirted. Went out with work friends a few times. I liked her.

Bartenders are cocky. It gets ‘em laid…

But bartender Jake (me) made a big mistake. Was it:

  • Her ass?
  • Her blonde hair?
  • Her toned body?

I mean, I messed up. Got carried away. I embarrassed myself. But not ‘coz of any of those things.

I messed up ‘coz she lost attraction… And it was all my fault

Without attraction you have nothing!

Lemme tell you what happened…

I planned a date with her. Things were good. I was nervous. Excited. Didn’t wanna screw up.

I told her we could go anywhere she wanted. Told her I didn’t mind. I’d take her out anywhere. (As I write this I can feel my older-self sad for this poor kid. I didn’t have a clue!)

She picked somewhere expensive. An amazing restaurant.

(This was a test. I didn’t know it back then. I shoulda said, ‘Wow. That place is gooood. But we can’t go there. That’s where people go to pop the question. Down on one knee. Engagement! Maybe you wanna move fast, but please – not that fuckin’ quick! You’re like Speedy Gonzalez… Let’s just get a pizza.’)

I meekly said, ‘Ok,’ while thinking about my last tiny payslip.

‘I really like her. Let’s show her a good time…’ I thought.

We sat. She chose the wine. Expensive…

Then she got her phone out. Started texting her friends. I sat and waited. Patient like a saint.

(This doesn’t happen these days. If it did I’d say, ‘Text when I go to the toilet. You can tell your friends what I’m wearing then. And how you’re having the best time ever…’)

But I waited. She finished. And said the wine was good. It was, by the way…

Then I said what I’d been wanting to say. ‘I really like you. Thank you for coming on this date. I’ve been excited.’

If I said this today, it could work. Back then, it was suicide.

I saw her response. The sparkle was gone. Her eyes looked dull. She said I was a great guy. But I knew something was missing.

Throughout the meal I couldn’t read her. Didn’t know what she was thinking. Was she bored? She said she was tired. That she had work tomorrow. She wanted to sleep.


At the end of the night I tried meekly to kiss her. She gave me her cheek. No kiss for Jake tonight. I trudged home. Alone.

Over the next few weeks she was different. Cooler with me. Cold, sometimes.

She took a week’s holiday. But stayed in town. I called daily. Twice daily. Nothing…

I told her I really liked her. I thought she was amazing. I was totally into her. No response.

Then she came into work. I was on a lunch-break. And she said those words. Words I’m sure you’ve heard before.

‘Jake, I think you’re a really great guy. Thank you for dinner the other week. I don’t want to ruin our friendship though. Let’s just be friends.’

And with that, I never got to sample Danielle’s ass or her toned, sexy body…

I’m sure you’ve heard those words before. Maybe more than once. Maybe a load of times.

But WHY?

I’ll tell you…

As I became less attractive I tried harder. I tried to please her. She saw me as a pushover.

As soon as you’re a pushover, girls lose interest. And when they’re not attracted to you, as soon as you tell her how you feel:


You actually do more harm than good. I know it. I hope you now know it too.

I was too quick. I complimented her. I showed her my whole hand. I was no longer mysterious. I was just another guy who wanted to sleep with her.

Game. Over.

The way to build attraction is to be a man. I should have lead. I should have taken her where I wanted to go. I should have told her to put her phone down. I should have positively and negatively validated her. I should have been a freakin’ MAN…

If you want to learn the other mistakes that make you unattractive sign up to my email masterclass. It’s bite-sized emails. So you learn without information-overload.

I also tell you exactly what to do. How to talk. How to make things sexual. How to be, to be an attractive man… Sign up to the Masterclass through this link (it doesn’t cost one single cent) and your life will get better. I’ll help you every step of the way…


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